that feeling when you defeat yourself

yourself?? no typo. what I mean is LUST. yup, my lust..haha I find it really hard to do something good right now(its far easier before) but when I succeed on overcoming it, god know how great the feeling is. like defeating your biggest nemesis(which really is). yeah!!! victory is mine!! defeat is mine too..haha I like the smell


humm, I feel bad because I failed to istiqamah in my ibadah as planned. on the other hand, it seems that its slightly affected by mood, which is wrong. sigh, I'm happier in my ibadah when i'm happy and lazier when i'm sad/depressed and its uncontrollable. which can't be an excuse either. god, why is it so hard to be good???

Sesungguhnya Allah beserta orang-orang yang bertaqwa, dan orang-orang yang berusaha memperbaiki amalannya. an-nahl ayat 128

this is Allah's promise to every person that strive to be better..

still got more to learn, yet no time to lose( ok I lied, im in paradise, soo bored and got lots of time) haha i cant wait to move my ass off this house. to UiTM-a place of learning. and I got some to-do list to be accomplished there. hehe

1. change personality: funny/clumsy>cool/neat


2. zero cursing


3. dont be lackey and mundane


4. study seriously


5. play seriously


6. be more brave, shout your thoughts( useful one for sure )


7. zero talkin trash


8. gain respect( yes, im lack of it in taiping T-T)


9. ummm, ha! be thinner( 218 flight of stairs waitin, I see bright light )


10. survive

huaaahh, owh and by the way, I'll be making spectacles tomorrow insyaallah. you know what that mean..me eyes....T-T

zzzzzzzz....